I'm glad a fellow Army wife put me on to writing about my life on line, and publishing it so that others might be able to understand that they're not alone. I wish I would've done it sooner, it might have helped me cope with the deployment situation a little bit better, and maybe would've found some support from interested readers. So now I'll be using this blog site as my realease...a realease of stress, a release of anger and disappointment, and a release from having thoughts and other feelings sealed up in my head and in my heart. I'll be writing about all kinds of military issues that I've been dealing with since I married and joined my husband at our first duty station. I'm looking forward to venting and complaining about the military issues I disagree with, as well as commenting on the things that I DO agree with and enjoy about this life.
I know that there are many other blogs out there about being a military spouse, but not every story is the same. And each one of us has different experiences in this life while standing along side our spouses that are serving.
Amongst the military ranks of army/military spouses you have the quiet wives who only want to be with their husband day in and day out, do not have kids nor do they want any anytime soon, stay at home dont get a job and are not interested in getting out and meeting new people - sort of shelter them selves away from being a part of things. You also have the "Army Wives" click...kind of like the t.v. show - usually it involves the wives or spouses of higher enlisted, and no matter how nice you are your just not good enough to be involved in their conversations. (Now I'm not saying all higher enlisted wives are like that, I just happen to have a click like that in my husbands Company.) They like to do activities amongst them selves, and hang out with each other and sit by each other at all the FRG meetings - and sometimes you could swear they're talking about you because your husbands work together, and for one reason or another(usually personal) her husband doesnt like yours at work. (drama drama)
And then you have the wives/spouses who always invite the newbies over for dinner, offer to watch their kids. They are the wives/spouses who happen to be more humble, which makes it easier for more people to come up to you and just talk. They are the wives/spouses who like pretty much every body and have many friends because to them everyone involved in this life is considered equal. All I'm trying to say here is no matter what kind of life you have in the military, when it comes down to it we're all different.....but no matter the job, each one of us is important - especially to our soldiers. Each one of us plays a certain role in either the moral of our soldiers AT work, and the moral of our family at home when they're NOT at work.
So even though you were in the kitchen all day slaving over the stove or just popped something in the microwave for their dinner, and at the last minute the Commander asks them to stay a little later at work (even though they've already worked a 12 hour day) and the dinner you prepared several hours ago has gotten cold, we're still glad that they are able to come "home" at the end of every day.
And that's how it was so often at my first duty station in Alaska. And now, now that he's in Iraq, I regret taking advantage (in some ways) of him coming home everyday. I almost cant even remember what it was like.
My life has been transformed into an independent life style with this strong outer shell that protects me from weaknesses. I'm sure when he gets back I will change, eventually, and become the Army wife, once again, that is able to see her soldier at the end of every day. I know God will never put me through things that he knows I cant handle. But I AM only human, and my strengths and weaknesses can only go so far. I am not perfect by any means, nor do I try to be, I am an Army wife.
